Mini-stories from my trip

On our layover in Tokyo, I decided to pass the time by buying a Japanese Elle and flipping through the pictures. Actually, that's a lie. I bought the Japanese Elle to cover the fact that Nick was purchasing porn. He didn't want to appear like a complete pervert/weirdo, taking me into the store JUST to get Japanese Schoolgirls Gone Wild. A spread-eagle Madonna was obviously a much more appropriate cover.

Anyway.

While flipping through the pages, my mom decided that moment was great for quality bonding time and started peering over my shoulders, all inquisitive like. When I came across a spread depicting red carpet pictures of Victoria Beckham, Gwyneth Paltrow, and Angelina Jolie, etc., I received her patented, "Ewww...yucky!" Here's how the conversation (generally went):

Me: "Oh, you don't find them attractive?"
Mom: "Not at all!"
Me: "Too skinny?"
Mom: "TOO FAT!!!"
Me: "Uh...you do realize this woman [point to Posh] is known for being so skinny people think she has an eating disorder?"
Mom: "Fat."
Me: "Do you SEE her arms?" [now Angelina]
Mom: "Still fat. Look at her gigantic boobs."
Me: "You do realize if you were to stand next to any of these women, you'd be very short and very huge?"
Mom: "Well, I'm fat too."
Me: "That you are." [jiggles her belly]

Yeah, Nick says I'm an ass.


And just for more complete documentation, photos of my dad's reflexology session.